contentment
What is your definition of contentment? I’ve been asking friends that question and their answers have varied from achieving their goals to being happy, to living their lives in God’s will. Webster’s Dictionary defines contentment as “feeling or showing satisfaction with one’s possessions, status, or situation” and from the book, “Shoeless Joe”, author W.P. Kinsella wrote “Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.” It seems that the subject of what contentment is and how to achieve it is not as clear as one might think.
A few weeks ago I had lunch with Brian, my former pastor, and after updating him on my condition he asked: “So, how are you and Mary doing?” After thinking about his question I answered: “She seems to be more understanding and I am more grateful”. His response was simple and profound “In other words, you are both focused on the things that matter”. I couldn’t argue with his point. Two days later, on Christmas Eve, I was in the ER with a high fever and a bottomed out white blood cell count. They told me at NIH two weeks earlier that chemotherapy could cause a fever and if my temperature exceeded 100 degrees to get myself to the ER immediately. I probably would have tried to tough it out at home but my wife was very persuasive so when my temperature was 100.6 on Sunday morning off we went. I’ll spare you the details but after a day of antibiotics I was feeling much better and was discharged on Christmas Day. Things could have gone terribly wrong but it was caught in time.
Brian was right. Mary and I have a better grasp on what’s really important. Stuff like what I’m going through has put everything into perspective for both of us. For the first 20 years of my working life, I struggled with finding the right career and the right relationship. After several dead-end jobs and two failed marriages, I had come to a crossroads. I could keep plowing ahead, hoping things got better or I could take a breath and reevaluate where my life was heading. I had worked hard to get what I thought would make me happy but that’s the problem. It was all about me. I can remember the point in my life like it was yesterday when I quietly let go of trying to control everything in my life and surrendered it all to God. In Proverbs 16:9 Solomon wrote: “A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” I have been blessed with a loving and caring wife, two beautiful children, a successful career and many loyal friends. As I reflect, I can see how much I have to be thankful for because I released what I thought was mine and sought God’s will for my life. There is obviously a strong relationship between contentment and being grateful. The following is an excerpt from an article by Joshua Baker:
I believe that discontentment opens our hearts to many unhealthy habits in our lives. For example, dishonesty is born out of discontent with the truth. Greed is born out of discontent with what we possess and substance abuse is born out of discontent with the current state of our lives. If discontent is the cause of many of our unhealthy habits, contentment is the cure. And if contentment is the cure, gratitude is the pathway to it.
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Gratitude provides a proper understanding of our place in the world – Gratitude is the feeling and expression of thankfulness for the action of others that are costly to them and beneficial to us.
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Gratitude assigns worth to those who rightly deserve it – Whether I am thanking a parent, a spouse, a veteran, a teacher or a policeman who has invested into my life, my response of gratitude to their action gives the praise and worth to those who rightly deserve it
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Gratitude directs attention to what we already have – Gratitude always requires our attention to be the focus on the good things we already possess
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Gratitude improves our overall well-being – Scientific studies over and over again confirm what we already know to be true: Grateful people are happier people
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Gratitude is not a result of our circumstances – I have met grateful people in the poorest neighborhoods and the richest neighborhoods in our country. I have also met ungrateful people in both. Gratitude is a decision and a discipline – not a response
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Gratitude opens the door to contentment – Gratitude helps us to understand our place in the world. It pushes our praise to those who rightly deserve it. It causes us to focus on the good things in our life. It improves our well-being
In life, we will all have ups and downs. No one is promised a life without disappointment, sorrow, rejection or pain. One of my favorite sayings comes from Lucy in the “Peanuts” comic strip when she tells Charlie Brown “The garden of life is watered best by tears of adversity”. I don’t know why I have remembered that all these years but it has served me well! It’s amazing to me though, even in the midst of all that I’m going through, how easy it is to focus on what God has blessed me with. By assigning worth to God and not dwelling on my circumstances I can be truly grateful for what He has done and my little problems fade away. I don’t know what the future holds for me but I know who holds it! To quote Bob Horne, a good friend who has since passed on, “If that’s all you have to complain about Randy, you’ve lived a pretty blessed life”. Yes I have Bob, yes I have.
To the moon and back Rando.,,, To the moon and back
But only if the spaceship had a Wheelhouse Grill!
Thank you for writing about contentment. I have been in prayer this week to live life with more gratitude and contentment. I just told my daughter this week that it was concern for me. I am still searching but I am thankful for so many things this week. One of those things is your leadership of our group. Thank you for all you do.
Thank you Randy! We love you ❤️
Love you too!
Love youse guys too!
Thank you for your kind words. We’re looking forward to being on the train with you and Dennis! It’s a blessing to be able to lead our small group.
Randy, such wise words that many of us need to hear. I too have struggled with contentment and gratitude. It becomes so clear when we focus on what is important and who is really in control. As our faith grows we also grow in gratitude and contentment. I love you and continue to value your friendship and wisdom💋
Funny how a little cancer puts things into perspective. Thank you for your kind words. Friends for life!
Thanks for sharing Randy. Very helpful thoughts to keep in mind each day.
Thank you!
Our attitude and our gratitude makes all the difference. My prayers are constant for you and Mary. God is good. He is always in control. Love you brother❤️
Amen sister!
Absolutely beautiful, thank you so much for sharing your heart.
I agree with you my friend.
Christy Smith
Thanks Christy. May our afflictions all serve to glorify the one true God!
Randy, I Lord this. This was well thought out, and insightful. I would love to repost it next month with your permisdion and and send people your way. I think what you’re writing is needed by so many. Praying for you.
Thank you for your prayers Christy. I truly enjoy writing and sharing what God is teaching me. Please repost whatever you’d like. Blessings on you and yours!
Leaving you another comment since I cannot edit my last one. I loved it, not Lord it as I’m sure you figured out. This is what happens when you write from a phone that is constantly auto correcting you. 😳
Ain’t that the truth!
Such wise counsel Randy.
I know we don’t talk much, but keep up God’s work. You inspire me. Praying for you each and every day.
Billy
Thanks Billy. Appreciate your prayers. How can I return the favor?